Tuesday, August 23, 2011

Jamaica

I recently went to Kingston Jamaica, my birthplace and where I half grew up, for my father's wedding.  I love going to Jamaica!  All kinds of nostalgia always abound and it's always just so intriguing to observe the culture and way of life down there, so different from what I'm used to here, and in some ways similar. 
Anyway, I always like to sit back and observe and what I'm about to comment on is in no way new.  It exists in many countries, not just the islands, and even here in the US and has for a long time and probably won't change any time soon.  While I was there with my family, there were many casual references to skin bleaching and "long-hair pretty girls". I must mention that I was with my sister on my father's side who is about 3 years my junior and looks nothing like me.  I am dark skinned, and I have short natural hair at the moment. I am thin and lean with modest curves.  My sister is big-boned, and "thick" as men might call it, she is very light-skinned and has long hair (extensions) with highlights.  I was not looking for this but couldn't help  but notice the attention my sister got from men in general versus me.  Now I'm a fairly attractive women, and I get my share of unsolicited attention from men so there is no insecurity at play here.  But several men at the hotel where we stayed seemed to be obsessed with her.  We were often together and they would come over and not even look in my direction as they proceeded to sweet talk her.  It was amusing at first, then I started to question why this was, then it was just plain uncomfortable after awhile.  They seemed to be caught up in the thickness, long hair, and light skinned thing which I've always known is the ideal for men in Jamaica even moreso than in the US.  It didn't take this particular experience to tell me that, that's something I'd long known but was seeing it manifested plainly before my eyes.  One man tells me, "I'm in love wid yuh sista, y'know?".  I smiled and nodded, she was obviously in no way interested, but he continued to pursue.  There were at least three others who stared at her thirstily. 
As for me, I had no pursuers except toward the end an attractive gentleman who seemed a bit older (he had a teenaged son who was with him) who approached us while we sat together in the hotel restaurant.  I believe he was Jamaican but he was clearly visiting from the US.  It may have been just because I'd gotten so accustomed to being the overlooked sister by now, but I swear he had come up to talk to her, not me. As it turns out we are from the same place, South Florida, so we had something in common and chatted for a few minutes.  I ran into him at the airport again on the way home and noticed him checking me out.  He eventually came up to me and handed me his phone number with a smile.  I looked at the piece of paper in my hand and couldn't help but wonder had my sister been there with me, would he have given his number to her instead?... It wouldn't matter anyway as I was neither interested nor available. But somehow I had a feeling he would have.  I tucked the paper in my pocket (with every intention of throwing it away once he was out of sight).  I did just that and kept it moving.

2 comments:

  1. Is this only a phenomenon amongst people of colour? I mean, when a white guy sees two black women, I imagine he'll be more inclined to hit on the one with the more attractive figure/face irregardless of the depth of skin colour. I saw similarities in Asia: the lighter skinned women (Chinese-origin) were considered more attractive than the darker women (Southeast Asian) by cultural standards, yet western tourists always remarked how the darker women seemed more attractive than the lighter women, thus they didn't comprehend preference based on a lighter skin shade.

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  2. No, this is not only a phenomenon among people of color. I have not been exposed enough to other cultures to comment on that but it is very pronounced in Caribbean cultures and I saw it a lot in Jamaica. It is a combination of lighter skin color and voluptuous body type. But some African American men seem to have a similar obsession though to a lesser degree. Interesting comment on the similarities in Asia.

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